2nd Day in ICU The time she gone

(Community : Story of Glory Hom)
Glory's Story, Father's words,

2nd Day in ICU
I could not sleep. it was 4:30 am in the morning. I drove to the hospital to see my daughter. Glory was so sick. I felt as though my heart was pierced.
With great effort, she asked, " Dad, you've come?"
I forced a smile, "Yes, I'm here, how do you feel? Did you sleep well?"
She only said she wanted some water, but the nurse on duty would not let her have any. There should be no food or liquid intake.
Every hour, she was given a little bit of water to wet her mouth.
Glory then asked for the wig that I got her two weeks ago. I comforted her and suggested that she could wait until she leaves the hospital.
I stroke her head gently and whispered, " I love you Glory."
She replied, "I love you too."
As I stroked her head, I recalled a moment from twenty-two years ago....with great excitement, I carried her out of the hospital. She was born in Amsterdam, Holland. Every time I stroked her head, she was happy. Today, as I stroke her head, I know she would be comforted.To me, she's still my little baby Glory, but how different are my sentiments. Is this how I am going to send her back, stroking her head?
She endured her pain. Twice she told me," I have really tried my best."
"Daddy knows you are trying your best."
When Glory was young, we were very harsh towards her.
We told her, " If you are an A caliber student, do not bring home a B."
Although I often play the role of a merciful father, I am stern with her in her academics and her morals. Today, I feel that i am losing her. My wife reminded me to think from another angle, that we should be glad we have her for 22 years.
She's truly perfect. She has a beautiful family, parents and elders who love her....a lot of friends, school mates, teachers, brothers and sisters at church who appreciate her....she's pretty, she's smart, she attends a college well thought of by many....she has ideals and dreams, she is loving......yes everything, except one, health.
Death is amazingly 'cold'----last 2 hours in the ICU
Sept 18, 2am in the morning, the hospital called.
The doctor said, " Glory's blood pressure is dropping, her heart will stop any time..."
I immediately drove to the hospital, to be by her bedside. I was praying silently, " Glory, wait for me, I am coming to see you go..."
The doctors tried their best to revive her, and left the room.
I sat alone by her side, holding her hand gently....cold, very cold, it is true indeed that death is cold!
Holding her cold hand, the coldness crept into my heart.
I called her gently, I held her hand tightly, there was no response. She has left us quickly.
I had once told her softly in her ear, "When you see our heavenly Father, please beg Him to let you come back, OK?"
She could no longer reply.
I should have realized her time hascome, when 2 days ago, she told me she was hallucinating, and saw the ceiling opened.
For the past 8 years, she was struggling with cancer, struggling to live between life and death. She knew her days were numbered, that's why she loved life. She knew suffering would be with her always, that's why she treasured every joyful moment, and shared her joy with everybody. She loved people regardless of race, regardless of wealth, regardless of ability. Even schoolmates with peculiar personalities, she got along with, focusing on their strengths, and she loved them.
I watched the monitors behind her bed....for heartbeat, for breathing.... the numbers kept dropping. Lines that were once going up and down flattened......this felt familiar, as though I was watching the ER TV series, except that this time, I was not watching actors and actresses, putting on a frictional story line. Instead, this was not a dream, it was the cruel reality. I thought I was calm and under control. But my tears flowed. This cold body at one point was full of love for life, love for family and friends, love for a dream she had, love for truth and faith........but at this moment, the body was utterly cold. This bitter coldness has broken my heart. Why can't this coldness cool down some of my love for my daughter?
This love, as God loves the world, as parents love their children, is a love inseparable by death, a love still wanting to do something for her......would she ever know?
Although time can heal many wounds, at the pit of the wound, subtly, the pain remains.
Sure, "Love" brings sweetness and joy, but "Love" can also bring upon a pain so severe that one will not want to live on.