Nov.13, 2005 Glory's Diary

(Community : Story of Glory Hom)
Glory's Diary, Glory's Story

Ambition, Success, greed. It’s So weird – everything that I’ve come in contact- magazine/ TV lately have been emphasizing these three things. And just like with anything- an over dose of these ideas has made me sort of money crazy. And I think that at first I was trying to pass it off as ambition & the will to be independent, but I think that right now….this is my idol-money- independence. On the other hand….I just feel like with me everything always has a “time limit” Like I’ll be really dedicated to something for a while….. and just as I’m about to become better I quit or I become board. Like …I have commitment issues. It was like this with violin, with swimming, I have a problem committing to one thing! And I feel like that’s going to happen to me again with this business that I’m trying to start. I think that I don’t have enough confidence in myself to do it. And it’s like that Times article says …. Some people have big dreams, but aren’t ambitious enough to pressure it, or like people who doesn’t have a clear passion, but a lot of energy & the energy just sort of dissipates. I feel like that I’m one of those people. But then I feel like wanting to be successful might be a sin because that would be putting my want for success before God.

But yesterday, my sister in Christ said something that I hope to remember forever, She said: Don’t settle – chase after God and see who can catch up.

Sigh….I must admit my Christian life has been pretty stagnant and I pray that I will be more eager to learn about Him.